woke up feeling the extra booze of strength within me..and is not just the 8hours sleep i managed to get after 2 weeks...A leap of joy rushed to me when i read an sms ... :lol: My cgl would be touching Singapore in the evening! I miss her more badly than when my brother left for NS,haha.. Seriously, i'm really not sure what she will say about the happenings in cg for past 10 days since she left... I'm sure she'll be able to restore and strengthened all that has happened.. amen... Coincidently, her bdae is tml too... hmmmz... seemed as thought she only left yersday...with a wink of the eye, the responsibilities in my heart will be taken back soon...hee.. it was a gd experience, but till i'm armed n prepared.. shall stay away for awhile... Cant wait for cell group on sat. feels strange without it for 2 weeks... hmmm, i gotta spend the weekend doing some sports too...getting abit lazy.... Father's day is this sunday as well...think i'll get eye messager....my tuition kid is getting a guitar for her dad! can u believe it, she's 13 and her budget is 200 bucks...tsk... kids nowadays....=P
my friend said he will never want to read my blog anymore... :cry: 'too exagerated, too much feelings, too negative' ....but that's everybody isnt it... but i always believe is not how u start..is how u end...u may seem as though as u're sinking , but once u know it, it'll be how u pick urself out from the pithole of death. Every Experience can turn out be for good. I've learnt that my pasts have become a blessing and God's name is glorified when i help somebody with the same problem or of similar nature.
This morning, I was thinking about my furture cg and how they wil be youths and all.. But another image flashed...that they will grow as i age...by then, i will have been given the capacity to take the older members. and there n den, God spoke to me to be prepared to move even higher now because time isnt gona wait for me and i'm not going to stay 20 forever.. i felt so convicted.. i dont want to leave life loosely while i'm still young... it'll be too late to regret...
i skimmed through my past blogs, I had a gd laugh at some of de entries...others, it brought back memories of the destructions i caused myself into...my self-pity.. pride... the walls in my head.... mental walls u'll call that.. my best friend would have been pls with my recovery... if i could take the step to face him.. i'm forever grateful for the energy he spend on me... when i was deemed as stubborn.... he prayed n fasted for me... in times of darkness, he brought joy.... the brotherly love that showered me trickled on me like raindrops... I wana move on.... maybe stop blogging forever or get another addy....think bloggers are normadics....as soon as they are satisfied with the pastures they go on in search of fresher ones... the contextual meaning here is life itself... :lol: Someone asked me yersday when i'm gona raise up... 'when i'm ready' i replied... but we all know we will never feel 'ready' ...is the steps toward it which God will used to multiply... my friend make a statement which caught me ' u will be a good leader, i've seen u ..u always have a heart for ppl' ... A movement in my heart stired and arouse... i knew somehow it fitted to a confirmation i wanted from God in my directions of ministry... I remember another cgl , Nick, saying this to me recently ' Diana, u're nearly there...u're gona do great things for God. GO on ' and den the presence of God came again and God said ' Leave ur ungodly desires, the last lap is the toughest u have to extra vigilant the devil is like a thief, he robs, kills n destroy in the night.' ... in my prayer closet, i cried to Him 'Jesus, give me strength! Help me to guard every single gifts u have given me. Jesus, remove every sin in my heart! Bring me up to where you are. Show me ur ways. Teach me. I want to be a leader for you. I want to bring the gospel to the lost. I will tend ur sheeps. Deliver me from temptations. ' i cried as God tenderly picked me up and filled my heart... i laughed as the joy of the Holy Ghost came upon me.... God, u're just so amazing...
'i never know how much it costs, to see my sins upon that cross' i was in waiting for my dad and i asked God, what can i do, wat should i do....and the Holy Spirit spoke gently in my heart. reveal the story, i will lead you...
' To guard the passion and presence of God n your heart, choose your words the way you choose your friends...wisely. Know they will be few but precious.' A friend whom i prayed n counselled was wat the bible said ...'a dog that went back to its vomit' The secret longing in the heart, wounded and defiled. For days i mourned for his soul. Angry at my lack of ability, angry at his lack of commitment, perseverance. This was the guy i knew a few years ago, back den, i was known as the irc queen..yar sure, ppl came into #cityharvest and i was popular...n y not, those were the ppl lost in cyberspace, they dwell in misery choosing to be an escapist. I was like music in their ears... But i woke up to reality that these ppl can never be properly discipled. They were not willing to see the situation and make a firm decision. Their self-righteousness and compromising self proof to be self-destructive as well. I left the place, with a few others that r now on their way to being great leaders for God. But the guy stayed in my contact for some reason. After a few months, i decided to meet him up with a friend. He had a story. He wanted ears. I thought I could be the one coz i wanted him to slide back to God. It was my first attempt on a backslider...and he was from my church 5 years ago! It was difficult in the start. The ignorant in me caused me to spend nites even thru my exam period trying to get him out of his senses. His head was harden....bad experiences, age played their parts. But i had faith....to knock them down...he stumbled here and there.... caused heartbreaks of ppl around him... i lost my hp in the midst of it... oh well... i wasnt doing it God's ways.... Evangelism is a joy God, not a curse...But the strength have to be of God...the wisdom, anoniting, understanding...I moved thru months tired, weary and discouraged... He was too much for me and my soul... my cgl intervened... she was the best person for it... quite immediately she saw him from the inside... i cried for days... how did i get myself in a state...trying to gain the whole world but losing my own soul... u see, i wanted to seize his heart for God so badly but the pride in him was a mental block n the steps he took toward God were half-hearted. God spoke to me one night. 'Move on..Do not fear, i am with you always. ' I renewed my love for the lost n medidated on His promises. I changed my mentality , ask for forgiveness and depended more n more for his wisdom n guidance. The same week, another soul was added to the kingdom of God. I thank God for this soul. A blessing indeed both in my life and my cg. I see a great leader in her. My trust and obedience in God paid off. Truly, we reaped what we soul. As what my pastor said, sometimes, we really cant see the furture but when God calls, move....walk in His spirit and u will never fulfil the desires of the flesh. I was thinking of some stuff i heard from my girl-friend. It was scary. I know there are many unfaithful couples out there. Well, excitement is for just a moment. Where u place you heart in, there it will grow. Place ur heart in sins, and they will grow in ur life. Adultery starts from fun... A revelation came in my mind.. Why would God give u the best person when u cannot be satisfied with Him whilst being single. If I cant even love God a hundred percent while i'm still single, what more so when i am with the right one. I've so much to share with my cgl. sheesh...
den i will really not encourage.coz' your work is only momentary. once you are out of a ministry, it is hard for you to get back and most of the time when someone quits a ministry, normally the person will not do any better than w/o one. probably you can ask for lesser responsibilities for the moment.
is funny how ppl are looking for always constantly searching for answers. yeah, i'm searching for fresh waters. i miss my leader terribly... Never gona take her for granted. Then again, it was a good one week. Revelations have been overtaking me....breath-taking encounter with the Holy Spirit and renewal of strength i've never known.
someone told me the calling in my walk with God is in my potential....sure, i love counselling, waking ppl from their state of mind... i love books, touching lifes with unspoken words....i dunno, maybe is the company i'm with....i need ppl to talk to, period...
quite comfy in the office now...talking to my friend abt life....quite scary what lurks behind a human mind actually...temptations, the lack of self-control, lust, greed, envy...think i should go back to my work n stop slacking....
is a bright and cheery day...a contrast to my ultimately sleepy self... there's something wrong with my blog...and i cant figure the correct html for the banner so i can remove it... :roll: anyway, i wana scream .. i've a terrible headache, wat's new.. thank God my bosses aint around, defintely quite unproductive.. i'm feeling abit pissed by somebody....n that's y i'm blogging...
Geee, i've this sorta unquenchable thirst for water these days...amazing... hmmm, a song just pop into my head...hope we sing it in church today.. the lyrics' really inspiring... goes like this ...' u're amazing, never changing, always with me enthroned within my soul. Overflowing...my heart offers, the deepest of honor and worship....u're amazing..' and it goes on.... think i should spend tml morning, playing my guit...been a long time since i touched it... =|
i don't know what i really wana do tml b4 the bbq...i wonder if i should even go....feel like spending more time with Joey...but then again, she needs more friends besides just me...
is a bright and cheery day...a contrast to my ultimately sleepy self... there's something wrong with my blog...and i cant figure the correct html for the banner so i can remove it... :roll: anyway, i wana scream .. i've a terrible headache, wat's new.. thank God my bosses aint around, defintely quite unproductive.. i'm feeling abit pissed by somebody....n that's y i'm blogging...
Geee, i've this sorta unquenchable thirst for water these days...amazing... hmmm, a song just pop into my head...hope we sing it in church today.. the lyrics' really inspiring... goes like this ...' u're amazing, never changing, always with me enthroned within my soul. Overflowing...my heart offers, the deepest of honor and worship....u're amazing..' and it goes on.... think i should spend tml morning, playing my guit...been a long time since i touched it... =|
i don't know what i really wana do tml b4 the bbq...i wonder if i should even go....feel like spending more time with Joey...but then again, she needs more friends besides just me...
lethargy's creeping towards me.... :? life hasnt been exactly that exciting...besides the fact is moving too fast...I wonder wat it is like after 21. They say time flies even faster after u hit 21. But i guess for me, it already is esp. when is my rest times....haha .. i cant say i enjoy school life more than my intern. but den, i wana see another turtle cross the road... hmmm, not forgetting the extra time to daze n daydream, or nitedream.... tat's wat i do best... i do think i have a gd brain but execution isnt my forte... so it doesnt matter..... hmm, i'm wondering wat i really am.....a humorous, chirpy, friendly girl described by some or a morbid, melancholic, negative, idiosyncratic individual fitted to me by others?
is funny how expectations measured to u are never justifiable. finna: i'm glad this term u are much more cheerful. Is a great improvement. You definitely are not like ur usual past terms. me: yar, i guess is all God's strength n all. else, i'll never get out of depression n i had lotsa encouragement frm my friends close to my heart. finna: ok, i guess ppl who have God or believes in one should be happy . me: true , i can be happy...n i try hard to ..even in my dark times but is hard for me as well. i'm still human...n my experiences r nt easily overcomed or conquered. tat's y i have pick my friends with care or i'll be taken astray again. finna: yar, find ur strength in God.. is not my time yet i guess...i'll find GOd when i feel the need to.
i'll learn to trust again...n it starts from trusting myself. living with hope but managing expectations. it'll happen i know it.. ------------------------- ------------------------- ---------------- i promise is as hard for me as it is for u. i'll swallow my disguist, i'm sure i can. I'll walk in silence behind ur back and make sure ur tail i'll not stab I try to forget the way u are i know u r make this way i'm sure we have common loves but is too bad i dislike u
is a childish part of me tat's the result when 2 dun clique i'm sorry for the things i've said i've tried my best to suppress my thoughts there's more u dun wan to hear so dun try to pick on me
the stage's all yours. u run ur race, i run mine be a rat i'll be my boss
the road seems long 4 season we face winter we harvest summer we reap the end of days draw close as we seat on the rocking chair will death pick me as He embraces u u gave ur life thru ur activites on earth.
i'll slipped thru the crutches of temptations for now.
refresh after a good lunch? nah, not me....i'm lost in thoughts ...again... weird huh....but tat's me , accept it or not... maybe it has sumthing to do with being unwanted... or just my alter ego fighting to take over.. watever, i've to get back to work... get it over and done with.... 18 down, 600 more to go... cant wait to swim later... the best way to relieve stress is exercise coz it is the only tortue tat ur body should have. not abuse, just plain pain tat shoots to the brain and down again... pleasure in pain.... i'm counting my days.. to wat i aint sure... coz life's challanges are never ending.. tat's how suicides come about, i'm sure about tat... wish i could be under my comforters, just me and a book to run away to. Hide behind the world .... :cry: is time to pick myself up again... nothing must get a hold on me.... gripped hard my soul... yeah, loving is hard..letting go is more tough... sat's drawing near....to skate around the ring with the music blasting....tat's life....to be with my friends, leaving behind my emotions... n the hypocrites
mixed feelings cloud my mind. pondering over the meaning of work. issit a potential, or issit a pain. .................... it doesnt matter when the clock strikes 600 or when the calender is flipped to sat. My spirit rejoices though it shouldnt be the heart is filled with joy as i party till dawn. ................... for now is tues is me, my files and the com. two girls conversing behind u but is me in my own world of endless thoughts... ................... I look around the room no familiar scent. no familiar faces (of coz) nothing of my kind. tat's nothing to be sad live out of ur comfort zone ................... the ache of the heart i wonder of wat or who i await the presence of my greatest friend up there i'm just not meant to be if u know wat i mean ...................... Under the wings of the protector no words can explain.. is time for me to leap n fly but fear grips me hard i yearn to be young again to stay within the innocent realm i hate to see the world where pride prevails in the ppl's heart where saddness creep like a thief n engrave their names in their mind. dun push it i try to shout but the rushing wind blows my voice away down they go.... down down they go... i cant live with them u know it... but wat can i do... .......................... is back to work again to attain wat belongs to me Joy i'll choose to live in endless love i will share Peace i'll pray for....
i stared out of the window today and was shocked to see the twinge of saddness reflected back at me. A rush of wind overtook me and the chilling feeling brought me off my feet. is Depression is beckoning me again...n again n again. Luring me with its long fingers..... The world flies past me ... Don't we all want to catch up with him....the wicket guy that rules this world. I beg to differ.....but what can i do or say to win this world....well, i'm not even close to a normal being with me weird thoughts spinning in my little head.....it hurts....badly.... there's no changing path, no turning around, no going back time... i've to learn to stand upright again , arms to my side and march on like a good old christian soldier....
been wondering about my directions in life and who i really am, in terms of character and my self-worth. is weird i know. n so far, no conclusion sums it all. Feel like i'm in a ship. well protected but bruised n torn in many ways. my relationships are picking up. that's great. thank God for moving in them. my understanding in my studies has also increased. tml's test lies the mystery.... my dad's pretty cool nowadays, managed to hold a conversation and exchanged greetings. my mom?? my fever is gone but the flu bug is multiplying itself , enjoying their flight, circulating somewhere in my body. been have plently of sleep....but my eye hurts, for no particular reason... haiz.......is one of those days. i'm lamenting too much... get a life....i'm gona stop blogging.
don't u just want to turn back the hands of time and re-do some stuff that seemed regretable now. yeah, that's me.. that's everybody.. but tonite i thought about it again and somehow i knew that my age back den would have evoked the same un-sympathetic feelings from the people whom i thought could help. Is true, age plays a part. How you potray or present yourself determines the kind of respect others see u with. Sad isn't it..... i gotta let go the emotions though the pasts haunts n hurts .sheesh. Memories are funny creatures. They catch u off guard and hits u real hard from the back. Mind u, i'm talking about bad memories. I learnt never to take a kid for just who they are. Teaching my tuition kids and seeing my brother going throu the same phrase in his life that's i've been, I can't justify my actions when I don't give them the benefit of doubt they desire. Sometimes, their cry to be seen as an adult is so tangible but diminshed by the few words i speak. How selfish and thoughtless. I guess this is it. I shant take another kid for granted. :cry:
bloggin's a scary place sometimes. u dunno who's crossing to ur side.... :roll: ...but den when i start, is hard to resist going with my train of thoughts and the flow. i've just gotten back....grr...piled with another load of work to do......wat a long day.Had my second tuition lesson today. we were discussing abt human, monkeys and angels...wat childlike innocence her thoughts spelt. i miss those days. *yawns* i'm tired ....but is too early to sleep. my stomach's working against me.again. Been a long time since i felt this way. The story goes... Din had much food the entire day and my tuition ended at 830...so i got home at 915.....and i was really hungry but the food just wouldn't stay in....is the same case. BUT gone should be the days where sickness clouded my being....n i was frightfully pale ......will it come n stay again? Can a person really get too busy to eat?
'Holy Spirit, Come with power, change my heart, that i may live for u my God. Holy Spirit, come with power, change my life that i urgh, how many times must i screamed in agony about interfering with other's affairs. wonder how many ppl feel the way i do. Not many i suppose. is not good to poke ur noses in other's business n is worst when they put a full stop . One who's dot is so round n sharp..at the same time, it pierces thru the heart of the 'victim' causing not just a full retreat but it feels like a full bucket of ice water being dumped over the head! *So Stop intervening , stop stop stop* And the initiative side of me dies off. It gets peeled off alittle....Will the selfish side get exposed? balance well my angel. .............................................................................. Got interrupted by my dearest project mate. hmmm, my class is cancelled tml. GOODY! can do my Excel tonite. mood: delirious Song: life in mono
clt,alt,delete (x2) n the com restarts, boosting its dead life back....wish i could do it for myself. ouch. wouldnt want bugs n virsus to hit my body though. Guess i'll grab a cuppa coffee.... my guitar's in 2 hours time. but the entire day is gona be a bore...with my project meeting smacked in the middle of nowhere. And for ur info, I've got tons of work to do n datelines to hand in. My friend was telling me about this prestigious PR company who's looking for 3 outspoken students in my school to do a 6 mth internship. That's exciting. I woudn't mind taking a whole school term off if i get it. But then, it'll spoil my life plan of graduating in 2005 n heading to the school of theology in 2006. hmmm. I figure a long time ago that I can get more from giving tuition than any other part-time job offer. I just might go NIE after my degree. With a no-honours status, is gonna be a slow slow promotion in a government-based job, sighz....how terrible can life be when paper qualification is all that talks. And for that matter, it doesn't help that i'm doing this computer studies which i absolute have no talent in. Doesn' help abit that my interest for Excel is negative excellence. oh well. doesn take a computer genius to know i'm in a biz course. busy course. no, business course. i'm blabbering. My insecurities r sinking. I'm drowning. Throw me the life-saving gears....not the river!
i'm skipping my mornin' exercise to share a story. The story of how each individual christian has a cross to bear. The love n grace of God whom gave us the key to heaven if only we were willing to leave the 'world', pick up the cross and follow christ. Why Christ? Because God redeemed the world by sacrificing his only son. He allowed the sinful ppl to crucify Jesus so that 'by his stripes, we are healed' and His blood washes our sins white as snow. However, many fall short of rejecting the devil so that he will 'flee from you'. The word of God says ' greater is He that is in you than he who is in the world'. God dwells in us as we abides in Him and 'no weapon form in the world shall prosper' Today, I wana share with you a friend called J. This friend of mine was a rather sheltered girl from young. She came from a gd family background and was in a relatively good school which secured her education and intellect growth. However, her problem was the lack of love shown to her. True, she knew who Jesus was just like I do. But she could never see that Jesus was once a man like her and would understand and love her as much she wanted someone to. At the age of 16, she got 'cheated' by a guy and never trust any guy. When her family neglected her at age 17, she couldn't face reality and was depressed for a long period of time. However, attending church din help her as she was unable to comprehend what was happening to her and was not open to anyone about her backslidden, doubled life . Back then, the little faith that she carried in her did not enable her to see what was happening in her life. She was living in bondage of the devil's lies. It did not helped that she had low self-esteem and her disrespect of herself deepen with time. What a deafeated life she had. Her root problem was the insecurity in herself. After that, she allowed depression to ruin her by allowing running thoughts to flow in her mind. It has caused many heartaches and endless sleepless nights. Her self-destruction paid a dear price. But all has changed. I'm glad she has come out of it. The cheerfulness and full joy of the spirit has emerged outta her. An unfortunate lesson and a true friend brought light into the area of darkness. Everything was exposed. She no longer had to be afraid n remain in isolation. Temptations are always hovering above us but is how we exercise self-control in speech, actions and thoughts. Truly, we want to live a victorious life. What do u want to gain in ya life that is both fulfilling and God-fearing? For me, I wana be that one person that is able to spread the joy of hope to those who are open to hear me. This is not just another story. It is a life testimonial.
another horrified dream i had.... i promise i wun eat before i sleep...again... it wasn't just another chasing dream, rather....it was about this two persons whom i love (in my dream) that were gona leave me.....till now, i remembered the emotions i had back then. I wanted to weep but couldn't ....but of coz, they were just dreams. I forgot why the chasing part came....but i guess it was because the people in my dreams were so croped up in their work, i was always on de move. scary. They say dreams are a reflection of reality. I must say i'm quite a frantic person who always watch my time. I emphasize...I hate waiting for people. Not anymore am i like the past, so carefree with time to kill. Every moment is sooo precious and only I can waste them....what a selfish arse. But i really dunno y i dream about the 2 guys. I can't remember their faces that well and they sure dun look familiar. My pastor mentioned in his weekend services that ur subconscious locked on the image u send thru' u conscious mind, whether is a fact or lie. I remember always proclaiming i wouldn't trust any guys and silently telling myself I was never gona be stupid again and that I will never allow any guy to touch me...that all guys were jerks .... Figures the irky feeling i get whenever someone touches me, pats me on the head. urghh... and me never being able to want to commit to a relationship. And i am never seen discussing about the looks of guys with the other girls. abnormal uh,haha then there's the other soft side of me, the sinking feeling i have when i'm alone. Not lonely, jus the thought of picking up the phone to find comfort with just someone. and the devil's advocate comes ....' u can't commit, u can't love urself, dun trust urself in a relationship, u aint gd enuff'.... and the whole circle repeats...
some things turn me off in life. well, two things happened and i'm ....feeling unrest. 1)[i] bad lifestyle[/i]. It isn't that i'm placing expectations onto others but realy some ppl aint sharp and they just missed the whole big picture when all they want is fun, enjoyment. is the Me, myself and I syndrome. oh well. One of my ministry mate told me today. 'Retention don't happen sometime because the house is not clean' it burnt in my heart and caused it to bleed. So true. For those who don't understand, well, dont. 2) [i]Going beyond the limits. [/i]guys are just guys. and i enjoy my singlehood . still am. period. Insensitve is their midddle name...for most that is. Anyway, my bro.'s gone again. for another 1/2 weeks. inevitable. His NS days. School days r back again..with a vengence. Look at my tons of work!!! not forgetting all the wt i gain during the period. I can see my face losing the sharpness...geee... hmmM, guess that's all i will say for today. Gona pray and yeah, have a better day tmw.....
' i wish the day has not ended. Now, im all alone again! ' the voice of my mom rings in my head. 20 more mins, and i'll be outta the house. Gona play pool and gym (svcs provided by my condo.) Money doesn pay love. U find ur own source of love. Now, we aint talking about temporary love here. Is the eternal love that leaves u a sweet feeling when u wake up and covers u like a blanket in the dark night. I pray for a perfect family. But inperfect man can never have perfect formations. Figures. Some dreams are meant to be called just dreams. Amazing, the CNY is coming to an end. I dread the end of it as much as the process. Anyway, i'll probably drop this feeling by the end of next week. Bye Nostalgia, feel from u again next year. tommorow's gona be another long day. wonder if i'll see him.....but arghhh.. i can't......i've to stay focus....can't waste anymore time dwelling with the matters of the heart. Very much an escapist ...and not a very good one. Hope my mom would be in a better mood tomorrow. Nobody will be home. :( can't help it. She hates us for going church. Basically, she doesn't want us to grow up....I pray she'll find friends and obtain faith back in her life....
every year is the same for me. Even the amount of money i get. So this year, i shant comment much. However, a new inclusion was a visit to East Coast Park. I was shocked by the no. of people there. IT was a sight, and a very funny one indeed. Seems as all the malay population had took this chinese festive season to have a get-together thingy there. Colourful tents were set up and not forgetting the neccesary items ranging from wet clothes hanging by the tree to ....erm, mini-stove. Man, i received another shock on visitng the last household of today. Realised one of my cousin had remarried n is a mother of two stepchildren and her younger sister is already attached! Talk about being the last one standing. haha! But oh well, i dunno wat the future lies ahead of me. Guess i'll work toward my carrer first.... Tomorrow's gona be another day. Don't think i wana anticipate. Is really nostalgic going back to the place where u visit only once a year. The times u felt when young is much different from the present. And of coz....we all grow up....in different ways. But i guess, toward the end of tomorrow, it'll leave me with a lump of saddness up my throat. Coz it'll be another year before i see my entire family getting together again....so much pretence and so many masks. But that's life....wat can i say.....or do.... :(
been long since i blog. fantastic time i had with my brother. we toured beach road..for his army stuff. He's really blessed , was accepted by PSC for a scholarship to U.S and his platoon is incharged by a warren officer. Good life he's gona have. i'm reading a book. 'the battle of Dolce Acre'. The colour of the book caught my attention but the end of the book seems far. Can't wait for tomorrow. Is chinese new year! hope i'll be more even more prosperous. Gotta buy a new hp. still pissed at the fact my phone disappeared. Blessing be upon the person who snitched my precious. i mean it... serious. Think i'll have more interesting stuff tml... not forgetting the fact i'll be meeting all sorta ppl tml. From those who'll comment on my looks to the ladies who'll poke their noses in places that excites them. I'm beautiful, single n unavailable. Period.
[b]Youre into loud music, hot guys and wild fashions. Youre most at ease when you've got all your mates around you and you like to party. Boys are a game and youre always on the ball because you make sure youre always number one. Your virtues: Confidence, fun nature, sociability. Your flaws: Loudness, jealous tendency, need for attention.. [/b] [b] A GARAGE-GURL.
[b]took out my curtains to wash them. Nothing left to shield me from the scorching heat. *ouch* my brain's somehow quite fried too. Thus, my book is still wide open with the same pages staring up at me. Been like this for a few hours. i'm nasty i know. rotting my time away. Forcing my butt outta my house soon. Gona find a good window seat at the library. Too much readings, too little time....and everyone nods. As i'm writing this blog, my cousin's dropping a comment. oh dear, he's 11...and u know kids... hahaha.. Kinda ate too much in the morning too....figures, i'm getting sleepy. I wanted very much to sleep the whole morning away but just couldn't do so. sleeping is boring. Guess i'll pack my stuff and gear myself to study the whole evening before going for my swim. Did i mention? My brother's going NS tml. wouldn't see him for next few years. That is , if he is accepted for a PSC scholarship to USA. Lucky guy. Gona miss him. Shall dedicate a poem to him. Add it in my next entry. [/b]
woke up feeling the extra booze of strength within me..and is not just the 8hours sleep i managed to get after 2 weeks...A leap of joy rushed to me when i read an sms ... :lol: My cgl would be touching Singapore in the evening! I miss her more badly than when my brother left for NS,haha.. Seriously, i'm really not sure what she will say about the happenings in cg for past 10 days since she left... I'm sure she'll be able to restore and strengthened all that has happened.. amen... Coincidently, her bdae is tml too... hmmmz... 
